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❶The man who is really, thoroughly, and philosophically slothful is the only thoroughly happy man. An essay that packed an enormous wallop at the time may make some of us cringe today with its hyperbolic dialectics and hyperventilated metaphysics.

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I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge. I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie.

Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal force demonstration. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy.

I once read Paradise lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA.

I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery.

The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prize-winning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.

What do you think about this college essay? Let us know your thoughts by posting a Comment below. We look forward to hearing from you! Who said he applied decades ago as a creative writing major? The essay actually does say a lot about him. It shows he is witty, cynical, funny, and creative. It also shows that he is brave, because he is not afraid to break the conventions of a typical college essay.

The rest of his application would have said what clubs he was in, his grades, and the rest of the things most people talk about in their essays. This is a funny read, very clever and just entertaining! If you asked a college coach or anyone else if you should submit this essay, they would say no!!! Maybe he had an equally amazing gpa and perfect sat scores etc…. This place suits my whim, and I like it better year after year.

As with everything else, since I began to love it I find it gradually growing beautiful. We hate old friends: We are nothing; less than nothing, and dreams. We are only what might have been, and must wait upon the tedious shores of Lethe millions of ages before we have existence, and a name. There is no desire more natural than that of knowledge.

We try all ways that can lead us to it; where reason is wanting, we therein employ experience, more weak and cheap; but truth is so great a thing that we ought not to disdain any mediation that will guide us to it. The essayist is really a lesser kind of poet, working in simpler and humbler materials, more in the glow of life perhaps than in the glory of it. I fancied I could not more oblige my mind than to suffer it at full leisure to entertain and divert itself.

Whatever falls out contrary to custom we say is contrary to nature, but nothing, whatever it be, is contrary to her. Let, therefore, this universal and natural reason expel the error and astonishment that novelty brings along with it.

Every man hath two birth-days: I have been none of the least able in this exercise, which is proper for men of my pitch, well-knit and short; but I give it over; it shakes us too much to continue it long. Considering the natural instability of our manners and opinions, I have often thought even the best authors a little out in so obstinately endeavouring to make of us any constant and solid contexture. Pig—let me speak his praise—is no less provocative of the appetite, than he is satisfactory to the criticalness of the censorious palate.

The stage not only refines the manners, but it is the best teacher of morals, for it is the truest and most intelligible picture of life. Quotidiana is an online anthology of "classical" essays, from antiquity to the early twentieth century. All essays and images are in the public domain. Commentaries are copyrighted, but may be used with proper attribution.

Chesterton If there is one thing worse that the modern weakening of major morals, it is the modern strengthening of minor morals.


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Robert Atwan, the founder of The Best American Essays series, picks the 10 best essays of the postwar period. Links to the essays are provided when available. Links to the essays are provided when available.

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All essays and images are in the public domain. Commentaries are copyrighted, but may be used with proper attribution. Special thanks to the BYU College of Humanities and English Department for funding, and to Joey Franklin and Lara Burton, for tireless research assisting.

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Published in Esquire in , this is the best-known essay by the late, great screenwriter and essayist. While she renders the experience of being flat-chested in the '50s with incredible humor and pathos, it is the essay's ending — the shock of it — that makes this unforgettable. More names of the most famous essays’ authors of that time can be found here. Contemporary American Essayists. Modern essayists are brave enough to challenge old ideas and adapt them to suit today’s quickly changing world. The fact Americans are one of the .

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As you may already know, an argumentative essay is a writing genre where the student establishes a position on a given or chosen topic and then uses evidence to persuade the audience to see things from his/her point of view. To write a great argum. Emerson most famous essays Variation sevenfold give coils three accurately miniature is a famous french king. Nature and the question of the lectionary, computer and latin america tells the audio audio audio audio books.